Would you sleep with a virgin?

Strange title I know, but it's a subject that I've been thinking about a lot over the last few months.

Of course, someone has to sleep with a virgin otherwise we would all be one. I myself have done so on two occasions, once with my first proper girlfriend and once with my wife (obviously you can only sleep with a particular virgin once).

There is a particular type of person who takes their main sexual pleasure from 'deflowering' virgins but, personally, I regard this as a form of child abuse (no matter the age of the "victim") or rape. Their intention is not to form a relationship with the person; they just want to be their "first". Like rape, there can be no real joy associated with this act; it's purely a power play. But that's not the point of this post.

Both times that I've been the 'first' were quite disappointing. The very first time because we were both unaware of exactly what to expect and how best to enjoy the feelings and sensations our bodies were experiencing. It was very different from the, admittedly very pleasant, "heavy petting" we had been up to over the previous few months. I came very quickly, she didn't come at all. A latter, less hurried attempt later on that evening was much better. It was similar the second time I slept with a virgin, not very good at the start, even though I was a bit more experienced by then, and then getting better.

At that stage of my life the learning curve was good fun to go along but I'm not sure if it's what I would want to go again. As an almost middle aged man, what I want from a sexual encounter is fun, excitement and satisfaction. What I don't want is some shrinking violet who is unsure what to do. I want someone with experience who wants to get the same level of satisfaction from sex as I do. That's not to say that there
isn't a learning curve to go through with any new partner. Part of the excitement is discovering just how a new body reacts to new stimuli, how one girl reacts to a certain action is no guarantee that another will react in the same way.

However, there has got to be a certain base level that you can both work from. I don't want to have to start completely from scratch; I don't want to have to teach the basics to a girl. OK, they may have a theoretical idea of what is involved with making love, they may have plenty of solo experience (which is a big plus as they will be aware of how their body reacts) but there is no substitute for actual physical experience with a partner.

Mind you, I think it's important to note that just because someone has slept with a number of partners and regards themselves as "experienced", that's no guarantee that they will be any good. I've slept with a couple of girls who, although they had had quite a few previous partners, were very much in the "lie back and think of England" school of sexual excitement. They must have been treated very poorly by their exs as not even the most gently of sensual ministrations on my part would coax any kind of reaction. Even my wife used to enjoy sex and was often multi-orgasmic although she was never keen on anything she regarded as different.

Nope, give me a girl who really enjoys a good fuck and has knows how to give as well as receive; a girl who knows what she wants and loves they way she gets it; a girl who knows what you want and loves they way she gives it to you; a girl who likes to play and experiment, to try something new; a girl who isn't afraid to tell you her own limits and to find out, and respect, yours. If such a girl happens to have the body of a nubile young twenty-something, so much the better :)

L&K

EE

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Tags: virginity, experience, erotica, firstlove